Romantic Love and Practical Service:

The Lady of the Lake, a post from 2008 that was one of the most discussed ever written here, talked about how the courtly love tradition allowed men to channel their romantic love into practical service. It examined how this form of chivalrous love is an ethic of willful service, one to the other; how this service diffused the tensions that endangered feudal bonds, and instead let a knight serve his lady as energetically as he might serve his lord; and thereby opened the way for women to occupy positions of genuine power in the Medieval period.

Such service needn't be grand, though. One might channel the romantic energy of the holiday into something as practical as making lunch:



Some lucky marriages incorporate this broader ethic of love and willful service. In time faithful service may win a lady's love, and her friendship; and her heart, so that she feels a duty to serve in turn. That is what gives you the strength for harder times. I have missed the last two Valentine's days, but we survived on stores laid in earlier years; and now is the hour for refilling the store, while we may, against future troubles that may come.

Happy Valentine's Day.

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